Picking Up Myself.



Assalamualaikum and olla!

currently, 230 AM. 

A late night thought kicks in. Usually waktu-waktu macam ni aku akan mula berfikir. Bukannya maksud aku dari pagi sampai sekarang aku tak berfikir. It more to deep thought. There will be a random questions play in my mind. Eg, ayam keluar dulu or telur keluar dulu or, where do I see myself in 5 years? Yeah, either I fikir benda random yang bikin gue bingung or make me more nervous. Lolz.

Tonight, I just want to write appreciate post for myself and some positive thought for myself. 

Tbh, dulu when people said love yourself first I really don't understand. How actually you can love yourself? How can you actually fall in love with yourself? Don't we need people to love ourselves first before we felt the love? I keep wondering. But I keep chanting the phrase without me, myself understand the meaning behind love yourself. 

As I go thru some things, I slowly understand what is self love. As for me,taking care and make yourself the most top priority is self love. I'm not saying we shouldn't care people around us. How we want to take care our loves one if we don't love ourselves? If we keep broken up inside and still trying to patch some thing ups, how can we take care of other stuff?

 

Have a good and positive thinking is a self love. 

Have a good sleep is also self love.

Pampered yourself with good food is self love. 

Going therapist to heal yourself is self love. 


We take care of ourselves did all of that because we want to be better, to be the best version of ourselves. Because without we realized there is some part of ourselves we want ourselves to be better. Better than yesterday. We can cry but we also can get up and be ready for another battle. We are free to feel whatever we want to feel. Because, namanya hati dan perasaan bukannya batu. Aite?

And also we know ourselves better than anyone. Trust me. We always know when and which one is the better version of ourselves.

Never ever denied the feeling of yourself. 

When we give ourselves the love we need, we may be start picking up ourselves. 

How?

We might start to do what we used to love. eg, reading. 

or we might start take interest in new thing. 

As for myself, I used to be someone who can read book 24/7. Anywhere and anytime. But then I kinda lost myself and I slowly lost my interest. I kinda hate that feelings actually. Wondering what happen to my old self.  Trying to remember how I was so madly in love with books and reading. 

There is on phase I barely finish a page. I keep saying I can finish this later. And keep giving myself some stupid excuses. 

Now, I slowly pick up myself. The old me who loves to read so much. Hello Aina the bookworm. 

and I think there is few thing is big achievement for me as for now;

 

πŸ’“ Not afraid to give a talk or speech anymore. I miss doing public speaking and forum tbh. (This one use to be my biggest fear)


πŸ’“ Reading. I'm half way finishing a book now. (Will share with you guys later ehek)


πŸ’“ Going into fitness thingy. (used to be someone who hates workout and stuff, but now I think kinda addicted to it. Good addiction!)


πŸ’“ Learn make up! ( a coping mechanism during this MCO.)


πŸ’“ Taking care of my skincare routine seriously! (used to be someone who bare finish the sunscreen in a year, but now my sunscreen is slowly dried up. welp. :')


self note to myself ;

Uwa I really do a lot of gooood things noww. Sob sobs. Good job Aina. You really did well. I keep praying that Allah will give strength to keep istiqamah in this things. And may be better person in future Aina! 

In anyway, I believe you also can do it. Whatever you are going thru right now, the storm will be pass. Put trust in Allah, and ask Him to help us to give strength to whatever we are going thru. 

So if you ever come across or stumble to this post, I want you to think three thing you proud of yourself. Whatever it is. Anything thats make you proud. Even making bed every day in the morning is consider a proud things to do. So anything can be a reason for you to be proud and love yourself. 

and if you don't mind you can drop your thoughts on comment below πŸ˜‰

adios!

spread love  

p/s : please ignore any grammatical error in this post. if you want to correct properly I dengan berbesar hati terima teguran, but on my email. hahahah sobs sobs. 

New Look!

 



Assalamualaikum and olla. 

Noticed any changes on my blog? Yeh! I've changed the template/design. Been thinking to change the design a long time ago but I'm so damn lazy and don't have any motivation to do so. Early this morning while accompany my mom doing her work, I did this. Yes, sebab I tengah sangat bosan so why not?

I think design/template yang sebelum ni adalah design yang paling lama aku guna. Mungkin aku dah semakin tua, so I don't mind much how my blogs looks already. Kalau tak dulu memang setiap bulan ada ja aku ubah. But I guess, let's stick to this one till I really sick of it. 

But I have my three own reason why I change my template,

but beforeeeee tu, notice tak my blog have some pink now?! YEHEYEHE! I really miss this colour. pink is life!

Okay back on reasons why I'm changing this blog design. 

 

1. User experience (UX) not really good. 

Tbh, I do read my blog times to times because, I'm that narcissist. Nah, jk. I read my own blog because sometimes I tend to forget some event and my blog is kinda a reminder event for me. As if I dive into my own mind gituh. 

So while scrolling and read my own blog, I don't feel satisfied. Usually, when I click certain link, instead of bring me to the exact pages that I want, it shows another page. and I kinda hate that. 

2. I'm bored

That's it. No further explanation. thank yew. hahahaha

3. I just miss some pink on blog. 

 

Tbh, tadi sebelum aku tulis aku rasa banyak reasons aku nak tulis. And now suddenly I just only can came up with stupid reasons. Should I usung my laptop to toilet? Because I got a lot of  GOOD ideas while I was there. isdbihasdbijasbd. aaaaaaa. and now suddenly pooooff. I only left with unreasonable reasons. why aina why?


Before

and now with this new design I feel much better to navigate on my phone. better than before this. if you don't mind drop your some thoughts! I really appreciate it. :) hehe thank you!

In anyway ignore the mess on image slider at the top of this blog. Because when you browse using phone it kinda pretty, but totally mess up on laptop. 


Here what i trying to say. Look how mess up. The image resolution aint uniform. So the view seems unpleasant. sobs.


but using phone is on another hand, i kinda like it. 


So yeah, end of my today rant. i might post more after this so I can get rid those annoying image slider. 

adios and have a nice day! :)

spread love ♥

Happy 2 Weeks Sayangs!


Assalamualaikum!

 

Hehe, hari ni aku nak share pasal anak kucing. Bukan anak aku. Aku ada anak tekak je ye. Anak tudung tu bonus. 

 

Pada 2 Mac 2021 yang lalu, kucing aku yang bernama Stokin telah selamat melahirkan dua ekor anak kucing yang pada awalnya tak nampak comelnya. Tapi sekarang kecomelan itu semakin terserlah. Dan warna anak dia tak sama dengan warna maknya. Dua-dua warna lembu. Stress pulak aku. Tapi hari tu nampak dengan jantan oren putih. Musykil ye. Musykil. 


Actually, we are come up with few names. Bermula dengan nak panggil chagiya dan yeobo yang bermaksud sayang dalam bahasa korea if not mistaken. So bila panggil tu boleh panggil CHAGIYAAAAAA macam dalam citer korea tu.  Nama ini di persetujui oleh Angah dan aku tetapi di bangkang oleh Kak Cik. Katanya pelik-pelik je nama tu. 


Aku bagi option yang kedua. Iaitu, Stella dan Luna. Yang bermaksud bintang(Stella) dan bulan(Luna). Kak Cik setuju. Sebab bunyi nama girly-girly dan gedik macam tu. Suka sangat lah dia tu. Angah ni jenis yes man je. Malas nak gaduh. Kaki gaduh aku dengan kak cik la. I also don't mind. Nama mak dia dulu, aku yang bagi.Ye, stokin. HAHAHA. Aku lah yang bagi nama dia. 

 

Tengoklah kaki dia macam pakai stokin kan? Hahaha, simple je nama dia. Kucing kutip je dekat jalan. :) Anak pungut nih. HAHAHA. 

 

So after maghrib tadi, aku tanya lah my sisters. Korang bebetul nak letak nama chagi dengan yeobo ke? Lepas dah revised segalanya. We decided to name them Sayang Stella dan Sayang Luna. Cuteee kan?! So kalau nak panggil serentak boleh panggil SAYANGSSS!! OJSDSBDHSDJAS. OMG CUTE! Imagine panggil makan dan main, SAYANGS BALIK! UWAAAAAAA. HAHAHHAA. Biarlah single ni. 


Oh sebelum terlupa, Angah nak namakan dorang Copper and  Tellurium. sebab nanti gabungan short form dorang jadi CuTe. Incase korang terlupa, Copper (Cu) and Tellurium (Te) are elements in periodic table. Chemistry thingy gitew. Dan nama ini di bangkang sekerasnya.


 

 

 

 

Aku rasa boleh dah mak depa ni pergi register nama dekat pejabat pendaftaran haiwan (kucing). Supaya binatang lain tau nak panggil budak dua ekoq ni nama apa. OK. Byeeeeee. Doakan The Sayangs membesar dengan sihat dan berjaya! Hehehe.

Happy 2 Weeks Sayangs! πŸ’–πŸ’‹


Lie after lie // rant on



Assalamualaikum! 


Tadi usai je ujian lisan Bahasa Arab (syafawi) terus aku naik katil sambil sambung layan kdrama yang aku tengok semalam. Lie after lie. Semalam sempat lah aku tengok sampai episode 6. Ya. Marathon drama tapi tak study. 😭 helok sangat perangai tu. Tapi ketaq dengan bahasa Arab. Dasar enggak sadar diri ini anak. 
 


Anyway, sebelum aku sambung rant dekat sini. Aku habaq siap siap ye,  ada spoiler. So brace yourself! 🀭 


Sementara aku tunggu kelas yang seterusnya, aku sambung layan lah. Let me tell you. Aku punya menangis tu, entahlahh. Memang tak boleh tahan tau dak. Aku punya patah hati part laki tu tau kata perempuan tu tackle dia sebab anak angkat tu anak kandung dia tu memang aku macam ..... weiiii.  


Aku kesian laki tu. Bila dia dah bersedia nak terima perempuan tu dalam hidup dia, baru sedar perempuan tu cuma gunakan dia aja. Lelaki ni kalau orang kata memang family man lah. Apa-apa dia akan utamakan anak dia. Walaupun itu cuma anak angkat sahaja.


Aku ingatkan dah tak ada harapan dah depa dua. Ingatkan mereka akan jadi kawan sahaja. I'm glad they get back together. Dia dapat bersihkan nama dia dari tuduhan bunuh bekas suaminya. 






This scene really make me cry a river. Sumpah aku nangis sampai terhenjut-henjut badan. Tak mampu aku menahan sebak di dada. Anak dia panggil dia mak sebelum dorang berdua masuk bilik pembedahan bersama. Instead of call her teacher, she called her ommaaaa. Hshshshshahha. I cannot lah. Memang merebess air mata aku. 😭

Ending dia memang dia trick aku betul. Aku dah redha kalau perempuan tu mati. Tak baik mereka mempermainkan hati aku yang halus ini. Susah ye aku nak move on. Cepat-cepat aku tengok behind the scene sebab nak remind myself yang dorang ni berlakon sahaja. Mereka sebenarnya ok je time off screen. 

Penat eh menangis setiap episode. Memang terbaik lah cerita ni. Pergi lah tengok. Sesuai la kalau sesiapa yang rasa hidup dia tak cukup stress dan nak stress kan lagi macam aku. Dan sesuai untuk orang yang nak menangis puas-puas. Sediakan lah kotak tisu.
 
 
 
 
 
 

Character development dia, storyline dia. Entahlah memang semua puas hati. Aku recommend sangat tengok cerita lah ni. 

and alhamdulillah, my syafawi went well! uwee thanks for doa and wishes. Ok sekian rant aku pada malam ini. πŸ’‹